The topic of slender vs. chubby in
reference to sexual performance in
the bed is one which raises ire in many people, mainly due to the theme of
‘sex’ in itself, because of that old taboo - sex and all bedroom issues are TMI and are
not discussed in public, at least not in African culture. Which is both
hypocritical and disturbing, as more and more often, sex is being discussed in
forums, albeit anonymously, and disturbing because those forums are found in
environments that are not favorable to a fun, open, tongue-in-cheek discussion,
but in back-rooms where language use is suggestive and sometimes downright foul. This piece is not a ‘dirty talk’, obscene, gossip
piece, but a healthy, educative, amusing prose at how a little fat may go a long way in affecting our sex lives.
When perusing the web, there are numerous
sites that blare out the negative side of men adding weight as they approach
their middle age. Other sites aren’t picky – they simply plague men from the
age of 18 upwards with tons of spam mail sent out by the millions – advertising
the sale of products directed towards men - warning them about their large
stomachs and challenging them to loose their pot-bellies so as to revert back
into sexual beasts. Just incase your imagination is poor, the adverts offer shots
of men in before & after
photographs, one with the man looking absurdly miserable with a pronounced potbelly,
the other of him smiling like a yawning lion – all teeth - while showing off an
oiled set of ‘sexy six packs’.
Groan, to the average man who has tried his
level best to loose that ever-growing chunk of fat slowly inching its’ way down/
or up, his chest, covering his well-defined pectoral muscles with a visible
layer of fat.
A
longer stay in bed
Mature women ‘in-the-know’ smile. Because while they may not shout it out from
the rooftops of their homes, they know that sexual performance is usually rated
higher when the man is – yes – chubby!
I kid you not. Researchers at Erciyes
University released a study proving that men with excess body fat last longer in
bed. The research which was conducted for a year, included both chubby men who
had a higher count of body mass index or BMI, and slender to slim, fit and
healthy men. The chubbier men were found to have higher levels of the ‘female’ estradiol sex hormone. But, hands down, it was the chubby men who were
placed as front-runners in sexual
performance – heavier men were able to last up to 7.3 minutes, as opposed
to slender men who lasted only 1.8 minutes!
The same
study also shook another other earth-shattering myth – skinny or slim ‘fit’ men
suffer more from premature
ejaculation – “we found that patients with lifelong premature ejaculation were leaner than the healthy control
cases” ,sources: A Gökçe1,2 and
O Ekmekcioglu1
That’s
lab test science. What do women say?
They prefer men with slightly more body
fat. Women are inevitably attracted to men with a higher BMI. In another study,
this time conducted with women, slender fit men with six-pack abs were
tossed aside for men who had 12% more body fat. Why is this? It seems that
women can tell by features alone, those men who are more likely to be healthy
and who have higher hormone levels. In the study above, women picked men via
photographs. These same men had been tested for both hormone and health-immunity
levels. Guess what? Yes, all the chubby
men that the women selected had higher health immune systems and more of that
‘hunk-stuff’ – testosterone.
Enough
of science, can we gossip?
‘It’s all in a man’s head, sometimes when
he knows he looks good, a man thinks that’s
enough, and doesn’t try hard enough to please a woman.’ True or False?
There may be some truth in this, for a man
who knows that he is a bit heavier may, by the very notion that he is at a
disadvantage, take the time to study and learn female behavior plus likes and
dislikes in bed, while men who spend time in the gym are reputed to spend hours
in front of a mirror preening and posing and admiring the perfection of their ‘pecs’.
There is also the quick thought that when
the ‘6-packer’ is in the gym tormenting himself for the sake of attracting
ladies, the chubby guy is probably browsing bookstores or the web, looking for
books with interesting titles such as, ‘How
To Give Your Girlfriend 5 Orgasms In An Hour’, or relaxing in an café – I am
sure you’ve maybe observed this phenomenon and wondered, ‘huh? what was that?’, - when
you see a chubby guy treating some drop-dead gorgeous female to a delicious
fat-filled pizza or ice-cream, both of them giggling and having insane fun!
Humor
as an aphrodisiac
Women like being cuddled* by nature and pillow talk after a good romp is usually top
10 on most women’s wish-list. In the past however, African culture dictated
such frivolities as outright rubbish, but, today there is a smattering of men
who do comply with these new requests
and offer ‘humor-in sex’ and ‘pillow-chats’.
Perhaps because of the thousands of
external disapproval stimuli the average pot-bellied man receives in a single
hour, whether physically or while surfing the web, overweight men may suffer
more from low self-esteem. As a way to ‘make up’ for their ‘deficiencies’, they
are more prone to lean back on pillows and coddle a woman. Plus, they are further likely to crack jokes
or carry out a light banter that will most likely put the woman at ease – remember,
he has ‘staying power’, a full 5 minutes
longer, so, he can afford to query, joke, tease, and play. A psychologist
may argue that because chubby people give off all these supposed bad first
impressions, they tend to negate that by being jocular, talkative and
sensitive.
*cuddly=soft, lovable,
fluffy, warm, huggable
Older
and wiser?
When it comes to experience, you have to
hand it down to the older man, after all, your average pot-bellied middle-aged
man has a million hours more bedroom time (and thus performance) than does a 20 year old university super stud. Add
more charisma, a sheen of confidence, and accomplishment to the mix. Aside from
this patina of success, which in itself is a super aphrodisiac to any woman who
has her hormones in order, could it be that it is also the ‘fat factor’ that
makes a woman glance twice at the pot-bellied man who winks at her from across
the room? If he were the exact same
age but slender, or skinny, the question arises, would she be as attracted to
him?
Phat
conclusions
Women – maybe it’s time for you to really
look twice and even thrice, at the 12 - 15% dude as a greater-staying-power-possibility
and reject the media hype regarding the skinny gym-type jocks.
Men - perchance it’s time to trash all
those men’s health magazines, ditch your gym membership and give in to another
beer - plus those
double-cheese-king-size burgers that are advertised weekly at your nearest burger
joint. After all, why should chubby guys have all the fun?
sources:
1Department of Urology, Erciyes University,
Kayseri, Turkey
2Department of Urology, Tayfur Ata Sokmen
Medical School, Mustafa Kemal University, Hatay, Turkey
By Nyakio
Munyinyi-Okallo • 2013
For The
xPenSieve Report
