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Tuesday, April 29, 2014

BlueBeard, the Key that Bleeds and Ignoring our intuition


read that first. It’s short and to the point.

Done? Good.
Now: Answer this:-

Why do we as women ignore our souls?? Our instincts?? Have we forgotten the simple belief that each of us is intricately entwined with and attached to our God? That the part of God which is Spirit attaches to our souls? Different religions call it different things: but the principal is the same, when we touch God, He moves in our Souls.
Knowing this:
What’s the reasoning for the girls first tossing Blue Beard amongst themselves?

Our Mothers:
From when we were little girls, we instinctively and intuitionally looked up to our mothers. If Mom said NO. It was a NO – NO was a full sentence – tee hee-  until we reached the terrible threes and began to question all her No’s, Nays, and Nevers in all languages including this English that came to Kenya via a Ship. This NO struggle may have continued until we were in our late teens and sometimes into our twenties. But, if you ‘brought’ a boy home and Mathe didn’t utter an outright NO, then it meant he was approved of. Simple.

The mother of these two girls, despite Blue Beard being downright ugly and weird and having a nasty reputation with women, still encouraged him to woo her daughters. Honestly, what insane type of mother are you going to be? I cannot forgive my mother for my marrying a Blue Beard– because there’s nothing to forgive – she had actually warned me but I paid no heed and I cannot resist looking back and asking, what kind of stupid chit was I??  yah.

Honey’s – My life is open. I write these things so you don’t have to go through the same heartaches. Daughters, pay heed to your mothers when it comes to MARRIAGE. Dating – well – it’s DATING (just don’t fuck around) and that’s fine, but a lasting committed relationship such as marriage ata kama ni  come-we-stay’ isn’t something to be taken lightly.  If Mom doesn’t like it – shy away.

(And with this New Marriage Bill – Haki ya Ngai, LADIES – write and make him sign a PRE NUPTIAL AGREEMENT!!!)

Ok. Continuing….

BUT???
HELLO.. what of the mom who is as ridiculous as the woman above? A word … (okay – words) to present day Mama’s with daughters aged 17 - 60. Don’t be stupid. Get out of your bubble and look hard at life. Even if you’re involved in church or some religious organization/work or involved in your hubby’s business up to your eyeballs, there are times when you’ve just got to realize that you may be so martyr or business bound that you’re of no earthly good to your daughters.
Do not throw your daughters (or sons) into a Blue Beard Relationship. Even if  - AND – ESPECIALLY IF - your own mother threw you into one. Let the curse stop. Let your NO be NO and your YES be YES. NO by the way, once again becomes the full sentence it was when your daughters were 2 and 3.. If that doesn’t work – listen to your instincts. Don’t pull wool over your children’s eyes or let yourself be dazzled by ‘Dubai glitter’. Many an abuser is a CHARMER.

Daughters of all ages??

Nyakio’s Out Of The Box Advice:

Years ago, I saw the BLUE, heard the RUMOURS and still got dazzled and allowed myself to be taken into my Blue Beards’ mansion. I didn’t listen to my mother (who for once in her life was right, albeit for the wrong reasons). And when my Blue Beard gave me the keys to HIS cupboards where he kept his skeletons, I lied to myself and danced outside with the keys in my hand, tripping and skipping in happiness ~ announcing to the world – SEE, HE MUST LOVE ME, HE TRUSTS ME. And I swore to him that I’d keep his trust and not open the ‘little cupboard’. But – we are women. At some point in our life we resolve we in our ‘maturity’ we want to take a closer look at his skeletons. Or they are flung in our face. Or we lie to ourselves that we can ‘change’ our man.
Oh how foolish are all the above notions!!

Yet had I not instinctively tossed this man back and forth in my head, just like the girls in the story tossed Blue Beard back and forth amongst themselves….Wasn’t my first instinct to … have absolutely nothing to do with Blue Beard?
Sigh…

Instincts:
If you balked at the first, keep balking. Don’t let anyone, whether it’s your mother, your best friend or the Pastor or Obama, or the Dalai Lama OR - most of all the original person, lure you into walking where you don’t wish to go – or, as the popular maxim warns, ‘don’t go walking where Angels fear to tread’.  You and me have NO POWER to change anyone except ourselves and it’s a lie when we are encouraged by other blond friends (apologies to all witty blonds), ‘oh – he’ll change for you if he loves you’. Bullcrap. Even you won’t change  - and of late us ladies demand to be accepted as we are and as we were found. ‘If you found me in a bar’, I hear young wives argue today, ‘why do you want me to change my modus operandus and go to church?’  True. Harsh but true. So then why do we think we can ‘change’ our male Blue Beards with ‘just our love’.  That’s plain .. stupid.

Btw. Allow this principal  - of listening to your first instinctive head-rush - apply to other areas of your life as well, be it buying a car or that job that seems like it will escalate you into COMFORT ZONE A++. If initially your spirit and soul was sickened and you felt down in the dumps about the whole ISSUE – then leave it down there in the dumps – don’t pick it up.

Life is too short to be drawn into Blue Beards Castle and in all honesty, life isn’t a party inside those castles. The key really does bleed . And once it starts bleeding – it doesn’t stop. We can hide it and wipe the blood off the key with our skirts and wipe it and wipe it and wipe it and hide it but – the bleeding just bloody goes on and on. In reading the Blue Beard story I trembled at the parallels of many a modern woman’s story – yes, including my own.

If you’re in a Blue Beard Castle – get out. Now.
It really is possible to live a fulfilled happy life outside Castle Walls.




Nyakio J. Munyinyi for the XpenSieve Report© April 2014

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